Who Taught You About Respect?

By Deb Boelkes

Do you recall the first time you learned the concept of respect? Does it seem to you that today’s society understands and lives by this fundamental principle?

Based on the pervasiveness of cancel culture, the hiring and firing of employees based solely on gender or skin color, the rampant stealing and destruction of property, and other flagrant violations of the rule of law, it almost seems as though respect has become passé. In my humble opinion, it’s time we bring respect back to the forefront—in our personal lives, in our communities, and in our workplaces.

In August I began a series of posts spotlighting important characteristics of moral character and virtuous leadership. I began the series by asking the question, “Who’s responsible for developing virtuous leaders?” As I stated in that inaugural post, it’s up to each of us to be role models of virtuous leadership. Being respectful to others and being deserving of the same in return is fundamental to being a virtuous leader.

At the time, I commended the Cornerstone Classical Academy in Jacksonville, FL—a publicly funded charter school for K-8^th grade students—for its mission to become a wellspring of future leaders….where every student will build a solid foundation of knowledge, discipline, virtue, and character. As one of its pillars of virtue, Cornerstone emphasizes the discipline of Respect:

We believe all people have inherent human value deserving of kind and just treatment. Our attitude toward others and their property reflects the way we wish to be treated, regardless of individual differences.  

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Can You Be a Virtuous Leader Without Self-discipline?

By Deb Boelkes

How would you rate yourself in terms of self-discipline? Do you routinely set personal stretch goals and steadfastly strive to accomplish them, no matter how long it might take or how arduous the task to master? Or do you tend to impetuously pursue whatever fun and feisty opportunities appear on the horizon? Once you begin an important pursuit, do you challenge yourself to stay the course, or are you likely to bail out if things don’t progress the way you expected?

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The Responsibility of Being Responsible

By Deb Boelkes

If I asked you to select just one virtuous characteristic that should be required of anyone in leadership, and of anyone to be hired into your organization, and of any candidate you might vote into public office—a virtue so important, yet so easy to demonstrate that it could and should be taught to children, both at home and in school—what would that virtue be? 

There are many virtuous characteristics to consider, and I’d love to know which one you would select as the most important to embody at every age and stage of life. One I believe anyone over the age of three should master is the virtue of responsibility—being willingly accountable for what you say and do. And when you make a mistake, don’t make excuses, or blame others. Instead, admit it, apologize to those wronged, learn from it, and move on.  

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Are You Known for Your Integrity?

By Deb Boelkes

If I were to ask your peers, your boss, your staff, and your colleagues in the community to describe your most outstanding qualities, how many would define you as a person of high integrity?

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines integrity as “Conduct that conforms to an accepted standard of right and wrong; devotion to telling the truth; faithfulness to high moral standards.” Some define integrity as “Doing what is right; never wanting to let anyone down; following through on commitments.” I believe integrity is one of the most important pillars of Virtuous Leadership.

In my last blog post, I asked the question, “Who’s responsible for developing virtuous leaders?”.  At the end of that post, I committed to highlight important characteristics of virtuous leaders in a series of subsequent posts. Because I believe integrity is so important, we’re covering it first, right here. In my opinion, it’s impossible to have a WOW Factor Workplace or a best place to work culture if you don’t have integrity.

If you watch the TV news on any given day, you’ll find plenty of examples of corruption, slander, deceit, and loose moral values. In fact, that’s almost all you’ll see on the news. When was the last time you saw such a shining example of integrity that you pointed it out to your kids, saying something like “Now, that’s a role model example of integrity. We should all try to behave like that”?     

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Who’s Responsible for Developing Virtuous Leaders?

By Deb Boelkes

You’ve probably heard the old joke, “How can you tell when a politician is lying?” and you probably know the answer: “When their lips are moving.” This witticism might be amusing if we weren’t finding our daily news sources so full of slander, dishonesty, and deceit.   

What ever happened to virtuous leaders, like the 56 men who in 1776 willingly pledged, For the support of this declaration, with firm reliance on the protection of the divine providence, we mutually pledge to each other, our lives, our fortunes, and our sacred honor, when they signed the Declaration of Independence?  They knew the penalty could be death by hanging for treason against the British crown. Yet, these virtuous leaders stood valiantly against tyranny, regardless of the personal cost.

Can you name anyone in modern times who exemplifies virtuous leadership? Can you name one politician you believe is a virtuous leader?  Have you ever reported to a leader you would describe as virtuous? Do you strive to be a virtuous leader?  

Chances are your answer to most of these questions is NO. Yet, if I asked you to identify a leader you believe is a bully, or a tyrant, or a hypocrite, you could likely name several examples. Why is that?

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Why are You in Such a Hurry?

By Deb Boelkes

If you are at all like me, you may at times find yourself feeling as though you have far more to get done than hours in the day to do whatever you put on your overly full agenda.

I will admit that I am addicted to an over-active lifestyle. In CliftonStrengths’ terminology, I’m an Achiever. Always have been, probably always will be.  As they define Achiever, “Your relentless need for achievement might not be logical. It might not even be focused. But it will always be with you. It is the jolt you can always count on to get you started on new tasks, new challenges.”

Regardless of how they define it, I’m well-aware of the reasons for my over-active, over-achieving lifestyle: I love what I do. I quickly get the things I don’t like to do off my plate so I can do even more of what I love. I am fascinated by—and usually driven to go above and beyond in—whatever it is I choose to keep on my plate. It’s like a game I truly love to play.  

The downside of this character trait is...

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Only the Present Matters

By Deb Boelkes

We’ve all heard the idiom, “There is no time like the present,” which essentially means that if something is worth doing, then do it now. Get on with it!

There is another quote I especially like by the famous cartoonist, Bil Keane, creator of the newspaper comic series The Family Circus: “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift—that’s why it’s called The Present.” 

When you think about it, all we really have is the here and now—this moment in time. While you may have tremendous wealth, countless valued possessions, and hundreds of friends and loved ones, people and things are not yours to keep. They could all be gone in a heartbeat. With the blink of an eye, some freak act of nature—like a tornado, or a flood, or a sinkhole, or a reckless driver—could instantly destroy life as you know it. So, cherish this moment and deliberately give it your best intention because only the present matters.  It’s all there is.   

How are your spending this day, anyway? Are you appreciating this moment as the precious gift it is, or are you just trying to wade through yet another uninspiring hour, crawling and scratching your way to the end of the day, without realizing any pride of accomplishment—the kind that makes you feel happy and fulfilled with each tick of the clock?

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Time to Reset Your Compass to Paradise

By Deb Boelkes

If you’ve read any of my books or spent even just a little time reading my blog posts, you know I am a big believer in the philosophy that life is too short not to love what you do every day. But how many people do you know who feel stuck in a dead-end job, or in a toxic situation, claiming they have no way out?

Well, in my humble opinion, that’s no way to live. There is always a better way to spend your days if you set your mind to it. If you find yourself in a no-win situation, perhaps it’s time to reset your compass to paradise.

It's amazing how many people I meet who, when asked what they do for a living or how they feel about where they work, tell me it’s just ho-hum.  They are hoping something better will come along. But biding one’s time, waiting and hoping, can be a drudgingly slow, less-than-fulfilling process.

If you want something better, then seek it out. While you may not find paradise right away, you stand a much better chance of getting there if you at least set your compass in that direction and stay open to outcomes while searching for that paradise.     

I wrote my first book, The WOW Factor Workplace: How to Create  Best Place to Work Culture, all because of people who told me they had never experienced a great place to work.

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