How Would You Like to Be Remembered?

By Deb Boelkes

Since you are reading this post, it’s likely that you either consider yourself to be a heartfelt leader or you are striving to become one. Either way, this is a great place to gain more insights and inspiration on being the best heartfelt leader you can be.

When you think about the heartfelt leaders you have known in your life, what words come to mind when describing them? What characteristics did those leaders who most inspired you exemplify?  

Now, consider the characteristics that you would like to be known for as a heartfelt leader? Are you there yet?

For as long as I can remember, I was encouraged by my elders and upline managers to start with the end in mind—whether planning my career or defining the desired outcome of whatever goal I was striving to achieve at the time. It’s vital to envision what success looks like to chart the best course to get there.

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Should Leaders Always be Fair?

By Deb Boelkes

As a child, did you ever say to your mom or dad, “But that’s not fair!”?

I know I did. I specifically recall a time when I was 7 or 8 years old, after my dad had come home from work. I asked my mother if I could go outside to ride my bike. Being close to dinner time, she said, “No.”

“But that’s not fair!” I exclaimed.

“Life’s not fair,” she replied.

My dad stepped in and suggested, “Being summertime, perhaps if you give Mom some help with dinner preparations there will still be few more hours of daylight after we eat. Then you can go ride your bike.”   

“OK,” I replied begrudgingly. As I set the table, I grumbled, “When I grow up, I’m going to let my children do whatever they want!”  

It sounded like a good idea to me at the time. Of course, now I know better.

Fast forward thirty years...

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Do You Know Any Humble Leaders?

By Deb Boelkes

When we think of great leaders, we often envision well-known military, political, or corporate warriors who lead from the front with an abundance of self-confidence—the kind of people who aren’t afraid to accept seemingly impossible challenges, take the biggest risks, and make the toughest decisions.

When you think of the greatest leaders you’ve known in your life, who comes to mind? Would you describe them as humble or self-aggrandizing? Did they boast about their stellar accomplishments or downplay their personal efforts in favor of sharing the spotlight with or giving credit to others for their success?

As I’ve interviewed dozens upon dozens of leaders over the years, the ones I’ve admired most were those I would label as virtuous Heartfelt Leaders. They inspire rather than intimidate; they coach rather than coerce; and they are discerning rather than judgmental. While they may have oodles of self-confidence, they are unafraid to ask forgiveness when they’re wrong, they are humble rather than arrogant, and they take pride in setting others up for success.  

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Great Achievement Results from Perseverance

By Deb Boelkes

Can you name a significant accomplishment in your life—one you were extremely proud of—that was without challenge? Have you found it easy to achieve your wildest dreams with little effort? If so, you’re lucky. Most great accomplishments are born of persistence—persevering with determination, even when the challenges faced are exceedingly complex and the going is exceedingly rough.   

The achievements I’ve been proudest of throughout my life were those I wasn’t at all sure I could pull off, yet I gave my best efforts despite the difficulties encountered.

One such experience came early in my career at IBM when I was offered a promotion and relocation to lead a business development effort with one of IBM’s largest accounts.  The opportunity came about thanks to a cocktail party where IBM’s CEO met the account’s CEO. Together they concocted a moonshot-plot to create the kind of bleeding edge technology that could catapult the customer’s global forward-thinking reputation.

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Courage to Do What’s Right

By Deb Boelkes

Sometimes doing what you know in your heart to be right can be the hardest thing of all to do—especially when your peers or your friends, a parent, or someone you admire is steadfastly headed down a path that you believe is wrong. While on the surface it may seem easier to just go along to get along, there are times when you know—by instinct, or intuition, or that moral compass of yours— that going along is just not the right thing to do, at least not for you.

Hence, the struggle. Where do your allegiances really lie? Where should they lie? 

It takes courage to swim against the tide. Having the confidence and courage to take a risk and make a public stand for what your heart tells you is right, when you or someone else has been wronged, can have a big impact on where you end up in life. It might make a difference to others in your life, too. Trying situations, when you battle with your conscience, are chances to make a difference in your world.

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Who Taught You About Respect?

By Deb Boelkes

Do you recall the first time you learned the concept of respect? Does it seem to you that today’s society understands and lives by this fundamental principle?

Based on the pervasiveness of cancel culture, the hiring and firing of employees based solely on gender or skin color, the rampant stealing and destruction of property, and other flagrant violations of the rule of law, it almost seems as though respect has become passé. In my humble opinion, it’s time we bring respect back to the forefront—in our personal lives, in our communities, and in our workplaces.

In August I began a series of posts spotlighting important characteristics of moral character and virtuous leadership. I began the series by asking the question, “Who’s responsible for developing virtuous leaders?” As I stated in that inaugural post, it’s up to each of us to be role models of virtuous leadership. Being respectful to others and being deserving of the same in return is fundamental to being a virtuous leader.

At the time, I commended the Cornerstone Classical Academy in Jacksonville, FL—a publicly funded charter school for K-8^th grade students—for its mission to become a wellspring of future leaders….where every student will build a solid foundation of knowledge, discipline, virtue, and character. As one of its pillars of virtue, Cornerstone emphasizes the discipline of Respect:

We believe all people have inherent human value deserving of kind and just treatment. Our attitude toward others and their property reflects the way we wish to be treated, regardless of individual differences.  

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Can You Be a Virtuous Leader Without Self-discipline?

By Deb Boelkes

How would you rate yourself in terms of self-discipline? Do you routinely set personal stretch goals and steadfastly strive to accomplish them, no matter how long it might take or how arduous the task to master? Or do you tend to impetuously pursue whatever fun and feisty opportunities appear on the horizon? Once you begin an important pursuit, do you challenge yourself to stay the course, or are you likely to bail out if things don’t progress the way you expected?

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The Responsibility of Being Responsible

By Deb Boelkes

If I asked you to select just one virtuous characteristic that should be required of anyone in leadership, and of anyone to be hired into your organization, and of any candidate you might vote into public office—a virtue so important, yet so easy to demonstrate that it could and should be taught to children, both at home and in school—what would that virtue be? 

There are many virtuous characteristics to consider, and I’d love to know which one you would select as the most important to embody at every age and stage of life. One I believe anyone over the age of three should master is the virtue of responsibility—being willingly accountable for what you say and do. And when you make a mistake, don’t make excuses, or blame others. Instead, admit it, apologize to those wronged, learn from it, and move on.  

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