New Lease on Life: The Blessing of Inspiring our Veteran Leaders

By Deb Boelkes

If you’re like me, perhaps you have a friend or two who occasionally sends you a meme or video that they have found especially funny, sentimental, provocative, or mind blowing. Depending on how busy I am, I may choose to give the missive a quick look, or I may set it aside until I have more time to indulge in such musings.

Recently I received a link to a 5-minute video originally published about five years ago. Due to the age of the post, I was about to set it aside until I noticed the title Reunited – A Short Film about Music and the Human Spirit and the description which began, “In this uplifting short film….” Since even I can use an uplifting message now and then, I decided to watch it right then and there

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All Employees are Essential. How are You Showing Your Appreciation?

By Deb Boelkes

With so many organizations scrambling just to stay alive during these challenging times, it’s understandable that some managers might forget to thank their team members for their contributions, especially as we enter the busy holiday season.  But it’s hard to fathom that any senior executive would think they can mandate injections for employees without serious repercussions.  What kind of appreciation does that convey?

Issuing mandates of any kind is not the way a heartfelt leader builds an enduring WOW factor workplace. Quite the contrary. Beloved and successful leaders—the kind team members would do anything for—are not dictators. Rather, they are the ones who lead through inspiration, encouragement, and appreciation.

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How Do You Overcome Underminers?

By Deb Boelkes

In the divisive, cancel culture world we live in nowadays, it’s sad but true that blame, belittling cutthroat politics, and undermining character assassinations have almost become de rigueur. Shocking examples are constantly in the headlines. Unfortunately, such abusive behavior has insidiously entered the workplace, as well.

Have you ever been on the receiving end of a colleague’s inadvertent or deliberate attempts to undermine your efforts? Whenever you have found yourself to be the target of an underminer’s wrath, did you reluctantly accept the role of underdog, or did you instinctively respond in kind and fight back in defense?

Over the years, I’ve seen some who simply pick up their toys and go play quietly in the corner in attempts to mitigate what might otherwise become a no-win skirmish. I’ve observed others who eagerly throw incendiary insults right back at ‘em—deliberately upping the insult-to-injury ratio—only to enflame an all-out nuclear war.

But those aren’t the only options you have when dealing with an underminer.

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Sometimes You Must Reinvent Yourself

By Deb Boelkes

Have you ever had to just start over? I mean, completely reinvent what you do for a living?  Does the thought of doing so scare you, like jumping off a cliff?

These past 18 months have been challenging for almost everyone—and especially so for those who have lost their livelihoods or are facing the firing squad, thanks to vaccine mandate deadlines. My heart goes out to anyone struggling to find an optimistic path forward to reinvent oneself.   

Reflecting on my 40-year career, I see it now as an unending series of rethinking who I am and what I bring to the party. For me, re-imagining who I could be and what I might offer to the world is stimulating. The endless possibilities inspire and energize me.

The possibility of failing at something new has rarely entered my mind.  Maybe that’s because I’m bored by status quo. “Because we’ve always done it this way” mindsets repel me like diverging magnetic fields of two similar poles.

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Do You Like Being Told What to Do?

By Deb Boelkes

Have you ever noticed how young children like to do things on their own, unassisted?

I get a kick out of watching my little granddaughters exert their independence when they finally get to the toddler stage, confident that they can dress themselves. If I sit down to help them put their shoes on the correct feet, the little one will emphatically push my hands away and say, “I do myself!” 

It doesn’t matter that they don’t know which shoe goes on which foot, or that they can’t fasten straps the way I would. “I do it!” they tell me—and they take pride in doing so, their own way. They don’t like being told what to do.

Fostering self-sufficiency, independence, and pride in fulfilling one’s own desires without the aid of others is an important aspect of leadership development, even for the very young 

A year later, I note the state of the granddaughter’s room when it’s time for a bedtime story. The bed is unmade from the night before. Toys and clothes are strewn everywhere.  In attempts to help her learn organizational skills, I’ll suggest, “Shall we tidy up your room first?” If I’m lucky, I’ll hear “OK” before mommy orders, “Clean up your room!” When that happens, the granddaughter is likely to respond with an emphatic “No!” They don’t like to be told what to do.   

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Who Deserves Your Heartfelt Gratitude?

By Deb Boelkes

When was the last time you thanked someone for being an important part of your life?

The responses I typically hear to this question can be quite interesting. Sometimes, I simply get a dear-in-the headlights kind of look, as though one’s mind is madly searching through a mass of files in their personal Wayback Machine.  

Now, seriously, give it some thought. Who were the key people in your life, the ones who mentored you and were instrumental in your getting where you are?

I recently had the privilege of interviewing Nancy Howell Agee, president and CEO of Carilion Clinic—an integrated healthcare organization serving nearly a million Virginians and West Virginians—in preparation for writing my upcoming book, Women on Top: What’s Keeping You From Executive Leadership?  During our conversation, Nancy posited, “I have a little brass turtle here on my desk. When you see a turtle on top of a fence post, consider how she got there. You know she didn’t get there by herself.”

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Make Every Day a Beautiful Day

By Deb Boelkes

If you’ve read my book The WOW Factor Workplace: How to Create a Best Place to Work Culture, you know I am a big fan of the late great UCLA basketball coaching legend, John Wooden. I particularly relate to this quote of his, which pretty much sums up my own philosophy of life:

Things turn out best for the people who make the best of the way things turn out.    

Regardless of how others choose to live, you have the magical ability to make every day a beautiful day—regardless of what else is going on in the world. I am not saying you should blithely be a Pollyana, but there is nothing wrong with seeing the bright side in every situation.  It’s all in your attitude. 

With all that has transpired over the past eighteen months, it is easy to see why some people believe the world is falling apart. Some cities have been virtually destroyed by protests and riots. Businesses have been forced to close. People have lost jobs and loved ones.

Yes, life is challenging. Always has been, always will be. But overcoming challenges is how we learn, grow, and become better leaders. The best leaders—heartfelt leaders—do the best they can to make every day a beautiful day.  It is all in our attitude.

I have a sign in my kitchen that says, “Attitude is everything. Make it a good one.” I used to have a bigger version hanging on my office wall at work. No one entered without smiling at it. It worked wonders to put everyone who came to visit me in a better frame of mind.

As I said in my book, Heartfelt Leadership: 

I am a firm believer we must look inside to challenge ourselves in new directions every day. We must lead and behave in a way that we continuously inspire others to be all they can be, too…. Heartfelt Leadership begins with you.

Complaining about the status quo and criticizing others is not inspirational, nor is it the mark of a great leader. Instead, heartfelt leaders reveal the beauty inside themselves, and they find beauty in others.  The leaders people choose to follow are those who give hope and relentlessly share a WOW vision. Be that leader. It’s really not difficult. It is all in your attitude, so pick a good one.

One of my favorite songs—from one of my all-time favorite movies, the musical Bye Bye Birdie—is the American classic, Put on a Happy Face. It was introduced by one of my favorite actors, Dick Van Dyke, who over the past 60 years has never failed to make me smile. The first few stanzas are these:

Gray skies are gonna clear up,
Put on a happy face;
Brush off the clouds and cheer up,
Put on a happy face.
Take off that gloomy mask of tragedy,
It's not your style
You'll look so good that you'll be glad
You decided to smile!

Pick out a pleasant outlook,
Stick out that noble chin;
Wipe off that “full of doubt” look,
Slap on a happy grin!
And spread sunshine all over the place,
Just put on a happy face!

It’s all in your attitude. Be sure to pick a good one.

The late radio and television personality, Art Linkletter, said this in his book, Yes, You Can!  

Learning to laugh at yourself, and at unpleasant situations that confront you, is one of the best techniques for turning a negative incident into something more positive. Also, the more you can stand back and smile at what’s happening to you, the cooler your head will be, and the more resilient and effective you’ll become in dealing with tough challenges. 

While I believe it is important to stay on top of current events, rather than allow the barrage of endless bad news make me angry or bring me down, I choose to begin and end each day by appreciating the view of Florida’s Intracoastal Waterway from my back veranda. I especially love summer evenings, when the sky turns brilliant shades of pink and lavender, just before the sun goes down behind the feathery clouds on the other side of the sound. The fleeting pastel majesty reminds me to be grateful for that one last glimpse of the twilight sky, perfectly painted by the artistic hand of God.      

Earlier this week, my youngest son and his wife came to visit from California, along with their adorable baby, Vienna. The last morning of their visit, I got up extra early to enjoy some precious, final one-on-one moments with the little one, who I knew I would dearly miss before the morning was over. But rather than sadly await their departure, I awakened the baby, got her dressed, and took her out on the west veranda to enjoy the bright blue sky and relatively cool morning air.

As we stepped onto the screened in porch, we could hear a gentle patter of rain on the roof.  “How strange” I thought to myself, given all we could see of the sky was cloudless and clear blue.

At that very instant, a great big perfect rainbow appeared brightly before us. As I pointed it out to the baby, Vienna smiled that happy grin of hers, spreading even more sunshine all over the place. While it would soon be time to say goodbye to my cherished family, how could I not put on my own happy face, too, and lock such a beautiful moment into my memory forever.

May you, too, make every day a beautiful day, regardless of whatever else is going on. Just put on a happy face.  You will be amazed at how much brighter the world around you will magically become.

The Value of Loyalty

By Deb Boelkes

I usually hear a resounding “YES!” whenever I ask a business leader or military officer whether loyalty is important in the workplace.

Yet, I find some leaders to be more focused on customer loyalty than employee loyalty. They rationalize that loyal customers spend more money over the long term and therefore offer greater long-term value. This may explain why some companies spend fortunes on customer loyalty programs—to incent customers to feel good about purchasing their brand.

But have you ever heard of companies spending fortunes on employee loyalty programs?

It has been my experience that the most impactful customer loyalty programs are organic. Organic customer loyalty costs little because it is the result of consistent interactions with enthusiastically loyal employees who love where they work. Happy, loyal employees naturally share their “lovin’ feelin’s” with customers who, in turn, become enthusiastically loyal to your brand.

Too often when I ask leaders, “What do you do to instill loyalty in your employees?” I get blank stares. They don’t know what to say. Instead, they express bewilderment that employees just aren’t loyal like they used to be. If this is indeed so, could it have something to do with their own lack of showing employees that they care about them? 

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