What does it take to be Heartfelt?

You will come across hundreds of characteristics people say you must have in order to be heartfelt. Most of them will probably be sensible and of course, they are good characteristics. You cannot be angry all the time and be heartfelt. Here are some of the most revered traits people wish they had in their personality:

Optomistic	Positive
Enthusiastic	Ethical
Listener	Considerate
Good-natured	Intelligent
Sincere	Wise
Responsible	Trustworthy
Friendly	Conscientious
Empathetic	Agreeable

Do you need each and every quality to be heartfelt? I doubt it. If one had all these features all the time, you are probably a living Saint, Messiah or a Buddha. What you do need is this secret.

You must have an intention to use these traits. This is worth repeating. You must have an intention to use virtuous traits. In other words, your intentions must be wholesome.

Intention is the meaning you give to your actions. If there is one skill in life that could give you infinite happiness and self-esteem, it is your ability to create meaning and your ability to create good intention.

Having a clear intention to be the best person you can be is the foundation of a heartfelt leader, mother, father, friend and co-worker. You must intend to listen with respect and understanding. You must intend to be ethical and intelligent with your decision-making.

Now, after setting your intention, let go of the outcome.  That is, stop worrying what might happen or wondering about being heartfelt.  Keep your mind on the moment, making the consistent choice to move forward, mindful of your reason for doing so. Keep your intention.

With this perspective, problems become experiences with which to learn and deepen ourselves.  You do not “have to” attain anything. With good intention, the rest follows naturally and you're on your way to being a Heartfelt Leader!

Comments

[Mark Goulston]

Thank you for your blog Darrell. Intention is a very powerful and inspiring word. What do you think the relationship is between intention, purpose and commitment? I would love to hear how you flesh those out.

[Darrell Janssen]

I would tend to believe purpose is the common factor between the three. We need to have a purpose, or goal if you will. Without a purpose, what is there to intend or commit to?

Once a purpose is clearly defined, we must intend to strive for it. This is an internal and personal belief of reaching that purpose, or why have a goal in the first place?
Intent is the meaning we create to master any goal.

The action to do this is commitment. Once we realize and create a goal, and after we intend to see it through, we must fully commit our actions towards that end. Commitment is an action we take both emotionally and physically. Commitment is a tool in which we see our purpose come to fruition.